Apparently, Harry Potter is teaching kids witchcraft. At least, that's the way the "fundamentalists" (for this essay, read "idiots") are viewing it.

These are the same people who feel threatened by other people's private sex practices and the obvious fact of evolution, so it should come as no surprise that a work of pure fiction would make them pull out their "book-burnin' matches".

Does it ever occur to these people that religion starts at home? If you want your kids to grow up Christian, then things like government mandated school prayer and the teaching of creationism are not going to advance your cause. Banning Harry Potter is not going to make your kid the goody-two-shoes virgin that you always hoped he would be. That is your responsibility, people, and yours alone.

Allow me to offer an analogy. When I was seven and my brother was four, we saw the movie "Hook", starring Robin Williams as Peter Pan. In the movie, he was able to fly. My brother and I thought this was the shit. When we got home, we discussed in excited tones how cool it would be if we could fly, if only there were fairy dust in the world.

However...

WE DID NOT JUMP OFF A CLIFF IN AN ATTEMPT TO FLY.

Do you know why?

BECAUSE OUR PARENTS TAUGHT US ABOUT GRAVITY.

That's right. They taught us that jumping off a cliff is not feasible in real life. They taught us that movies are movies and reality is reality.

Perhaps the fundamentalists should try it.

Of course, the fundamentalists are the same ones who, way back in the day, said that gravity was heretical.

So my message to the wacko extremists out there is:

Don't be surprised if your kids are the ones to jump off a cliff.

'Cuz stupidity starts at home.